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        Food Metaphors, Replacement Level Style

        by Piper Slowinski
        February 21, 2011

        When writing my irreverent NotGraphs post on Casey Fossum, an interesting question popped into my head: how could I best explain the concept of a replacement level player using a food metaphor? In other words, is there a “replacement level” food? Not every baseball fan is a math nerd, but ALL sports fans love food. This is an indisputable truth, and means that food metaphors have the potential to be one of the most potent teaching instruments since these amazingly quirky mathematics videos.*

        *Also, before you ask, this post is a direct reference to Fire Joe Morgan and their historic “Food Metaphors” tag, possibly the best thing that Ken Tremendous has ever created, ever. And yes, I’m a huge fan of “The Office”.

        Before we get into the nitty gritty of finding the perfect food metaphor for replacement level, we need to know what replacement level is. In case you have forgotten (or don’t know), here’s Graham MacAree’s description of replacement level, as taken from our page in the Library:

        We can define a replacement level player as one who costs no marginal resources to acquire. This is the type of player who would fill in for the starter in case of injuries, slumps, alien abductions, etc.

        These are essentially the Triple-A filler players that can be found in every organization (and in copious amounts on the free agent list) every year. They cost next to nothing to acquire, can be found in massive quantities, and should only be used in case of emergency – at best, they make adequate bench players. They are, in short, the very base of major league baseball’s (triangular) talent distribution.

        So with this in mind, what’s the ideal food to capture the essence of a replacement level player? Let’s take to the Twitter!

        This answer comes from Matt Bandi from Pirates Prospects, and I like it: rice is cheap, widely available, and by itself it’s about as bland and “meh” as possible. Of course, you can add gravy to it and turn rice into Albert Pujols, but gravy will do that to anything; it’s like the steroids of food.

        A similar answer to the rice: instant potatoes are cheap, widely available, and an easy fall-back plan when all your attempts at cooking dinner go up in flames. Also, I just like the idea of envisioning Bartolo Colon as a potato (since he already is one).

        I received a couple other ideas that I really like: cereal, toast, Spaghetti-O’s, and gruel. I think you easily could go with any of these when trying to describe the concept to someone, so it’s really a matter of personal preference.

        My personal replacement level food of choice would have to be Twinkies. I know, I know…some people actually like Twinkies and think they taste good, but don’t some people also love David Eckstein and Casey Kotchman? Twinkies may look like food and smell like food, but if you ever look at their ingredient list, they’re most certainly not food. And while they may not be everyone’s go-to fall-back option as a snack, if there’s ever a nuclear war and we’re left trying to survive in an apocalyptic hellscape, Twinkies will likely be the only food option remaining. In my eyes, they are the ultimate replacement food.

        So next time you’re sitting in a ballpark and the person next to you starts proclaiming that Willie Bloomquist is the bee’s knees, turn to him (or her) and explain how Bloomquist is really the baseball equivalent of a Twinkie. Or a potato. Whichever you choose, I’m sure Ken Tremendous will be smiling somewhere.





        The Projection Rundown: The Basics on Marcels, ZiPS, CAIRO, Oliver, and the Rest
         
        Understanding Projections, “True Talent Level”, and Variability

        Piper was the editor-in-chief of DRaysBay and the keeper of the FanGraphs Library.

        24 Comments
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        John
        14 years ago

        Twinkies are the Neifi Perez of foods. I think it might be more useful to start thinking about comparables. Pizza is a solid 5-6 WAR player with Evan Longoria upside. Sushi is the Albert Pujols of the food world.

        Replacement level for food does seem to be cereal because it all tastes the same and people eat it indiscriminately in the morning, barely tasting it.

        1
        Piper Slowinski
        14 years ago
        Reply to  John

        This might be coming later, but really, it’s pretty tough since everyone has different tastes. I may consider prime rib to be Albert Pujols, but others may think differently.

        Although I guess in the end, that’s a similar metaphor to baseball. Some people like TZ as opposed to UZR. Some people like RBIs instead of WAR. It makes for crazy debate.

        1
        Wade8813
        14 years ago
        Reply to  John

        Cereal? No way.

        There are a lot of cereals that a lot of people refuse to eat, comparing the taste to cardboard.

        A (highly) informal survey of high schoolers revealed that like 75% of them list Lucky Charms as their favorite, and many of them are quite enthusiastic about it.

        2
        RMR
        14 years ago

        Twinkies are a particular type of replacement level, say speedy guys who are fun to watch (tasty) but don’t hit for power (aren’t filling) and can’t get on base (no nutrients). I think you could probably do a couple basic archetypes..

        4
        Anthony
        14 years ago

        The implication that Ken Tremendous somehow “created” the Office is an insult to Sergio Giorgini and David Brent.

        1
        Jon
        14 years ago
        Reply to  Anthony

        He wasn’t saying that. Ken was one of the head writers on the show before he did Parks and Rec

        1
        Tanbarkie
        14 years ago

        It has to be white rice. A replacement-level player is, by definition, not good, but neither is he “bad” per se. He’s merely adequate – the bare minimum of production for your stingy buck. Most of the other food options presented are flat-out unhealthy. Twinkies and Spaghetti-Os, especially, both have to be deep in the negative NAR (Nutrition Above Replacement) zone. Eating a diet of either one will leave you in the dietary equivalent of a 120-loss season.

        It has to be white rice. Sure, it’s bland and lacking in many critical nutrients. You won’t live nearly as long on an all-rice diet as if you ate balanced meals. But you’re not going to die young, either.

        12
        Piper Slowinski
        14 years ago
        Reply to  Tanbarkie

        Great points! I like the unhealthy tie-in….that’s very true, if you lived on Twinkies alone, you’d probably go into cardiac arrest sooner rather than later.

        But if we’re talking about WAR here, then we’ve got to talk about not just defense but also offense. Twinkies might have a negative Ultimate Nutrition Rating, but their Weighted Taste Above Average is slightly above average. So overall….replacement level.

        4
        Gary Graul
        14 years ago

        White bread with margarine.

        -1
        Anon21
        14 years ago

        Fondant? Textured vegetable protein? I’m looking for the food that comes closest to the connotations of “filler,” which is a term frequently applied to replacement-level players.

        1
        Daniel
        14 years ago

        I disagree with Twinkies. They have their place, but you wouldn’t want a full meal of them. But as something on the side, they’re quite nice. I think Twinkie better fits something like a nice piece in the bullpen or a slow footed power hitter.

        The plain white rice is a nice analogy, but I’ll try to be a little more creative… Salt? Sure, you can’t eat it on its own, and overdoing it completely ruins the meal. But in a small dose, it’s actually healthy (payroll).

        2
        Aaron Whitehead
        14 years ago

        Macaroni & Cheese. It costs, what, 75 cents a box? It’s not really bland — it tastes quite good, but anyone looking to make a meal out of it will pay for it later.

        1
        Mike Savino
        14 years ago

        Okay, here’s my offering and here’s why:

        Replacement level must be readily available and pretty frigging crappy. I’ve been in college for a long time and I’ve got to tell you, plain white rice sounds pretty good some nights. Here’s my ultimate replacement level food:

        The 7-11 hot dog. Always available. You got nothing in your house and its 3 AM? Sevies is open and willing to sell you the most terrible, least basically edible food offering in the world. It’ll get you by tonight, its like 2 for a buck, there’s a 7-11 on every corner. The very definition of nothing else available except for this craptastic food makes it replacement level.

        Shouldn’t cost you very many resources? Check. Readily available? Check. Get you through the season? Check. Make you feel quite ill that you had to reduce yourself to that level? Checkity checkity roo!

        1
        yceberg
        14 years ago

        Campbell’s soup. It is cheap, readily available and can sustain you even through nuclear winter. Sometimes it has a low calorie count, sometimes high, but it is not necessarily bad for you. It can help you when you are down and almost out such as when you are sick or when your first baseman is Day to Day with a hang nail. Sometimes it is quite tasty, when it gets a key hit to keep a rally alive. Other times not so much, when it has a throwing error on a routine 6-3. It is inconsistent like a replacement level ball player, if you are constantly changing varieties. But it will do the job until a real meal comes along…

        1
        EdwardM
        14 years ago

        If “filler” is what we’re trying to convey then bread crumbs might be appropriate. They are cheap but essential. You don’t notice them until they’re missing from your otherwise tasty meat loaf.

        -1
        paris
        14 years ago

        Ramen noodles. No one seeks out ramen noodles. It’s what you eat when there’s nothing else in the pantry and you need something right now, or if you are a really poor student (ie the royals).

        Shoot–the last comment was three months ago. Why did this show up on my browser? How did I wander here? Damn you fangraphs for having so much interesting content!

        3
        obsessivegiantscompulsive
        14 years ago

        It would be nice if the Library has something regarding Replacement Value, how it is defined and calculated here on Fangraphs, maybe how other methodologies do it, plus what are the pluses and minuses of each methodology.

        1
        obsessivegiantscompulsive
        14 years ago
        Reply to  obsessivegiantscompulsive

        Nevermind, sorry, just found that WAR has a menu that describes Replacement Value. Thanks for the great resource!

        1
        Piper Slowinski
        14 years ago
        Reply to  obsessivegiantscompulsive

        No problem, thanks! Also check out the links at the bottom of the WAR page in the Library…that’ll help out too.

        Enjoy!

        1
        bronzillo
        13 years ago

        Ramen is the best answer. I hiked across the country one summer (App trail) and man, they are the definition of a replacement meal. They get the job done, but barely. They are never ever your first choice but they are cheap, light (hiking relevant) and temporarily filling.

        1
        CodenameDuchess
        13 years ago

        Canned tuna. While in the same biological family, David Eckstein (canned tuna) is no Chase Utley (sushi grade ahi).

        2
        dinapinkoluosies
        13 years ago

        i think maybe twinkies are really a bad choice but spahetti and m,eat balls are great 🙂

        1
        dinapinkoluosies
        13 years ago

        hey has can anybody contrast spaghetti and macaroni by it smell and taste please respond:)))))
        i need alot info about food”(

        1
        JKB
        12 years ago

        Tecate six pack, cans. If you have lime, salt, and an ice box you are the Rays. If you are drinking it warm out of the trunk of your car you are the Astros.

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